Fear is Driving the Bus When You're Dragging Your Feet
Fear fuels procrastination
I posted this as a note last week, and it is still on my mind.
‘The things I'm unafraid, even eager, to offer the world have far less value than the ones I procrastinate on because they scare the shit out of me.
Let terror be your guide.”
I drag my feet only when I’ve got underlying currents of fear going on that I don’t want to look at very closely.
How do I know fear’s got the wheel?
Behavioral cues that I’ve learned over decades of meditation and practicing radical honesty.
Craving carbs.
Watching trash TV.
Scrolling when I should be sleeping.
Becoming obsessed with organizing my many piles of books.
Suddenly dragging out embroidery and crochet projects.
Unless what you want to do has irreparable consequences, there’s no good reason not to try new things and take a few risks. Yet fear will scramble our circuits to keep us safe in our comfy little, well-worn rut.
Your Safety-Seeking Self will do whatever it takes to stay in your Familiar Bad Feeling Place. It will distract you, get you drunk on cheese fries, and make you lose half a day to 90-Day Fiancé the Other Way; it’s a-goddamn-ridiculous!
So, what to do when these shenanigans are happening?
Write out what you really want to do - like really really want to do.
Get present to what is happening in your body as you write it out.
Breathe into the tension and validate your concerns no matter how silly or illogical they may seem to you.
Ask when in the past you have felt this same fear before taking a leap and what the outcome was. Did you really end up homeless? Lose all your friends? Get a tattoo you’ll regret for the rest of your life?
Most likely, your fears are only rooted in survival - survival that isn’t truly at actual risk. When we write them out on paper, we can find clarity and decide which actions to take and when.
Maybe we can only take a micro-step toward what is calling us, or maybe fear evaporates, and we can jump right into the deep end of the pool. But we won’t know unless we take the time to ask and to write.
XO,
LMW
P.S. Nervous System Secrets for Writers is open for another 24 hours if you want help taking risks with writing!