If You Aren't Saying What You Want

It's your fault.

Preface Part I: There’s extra cussing in this post. I’m lowkey rageful about the silence I’m seeing from so many who call themselves “thought leaders” but who are staying mighty quiet about current events.

Preface Part II: I’m painfully and sadly aware that for some people in our world, speaking and writing freely does come with the risk of actual death at the hands of others. That’s far more nuanced than my wee Substack post and pea brain can write about. Consider this article to be addressing those of us in hiding for more lame-ass reasons - like not wanting to grow and experience discomfort - you know - those of us cooking up chickenshit reasons to stay silent.

I’ve been that person cooking chickenshit. I used to get laryngitis and lose my voice two to three times a year from backed-up words and stifled speech.

I don’t want that for you!

I want you to stop hiding and claim your freedom to write, speak, and express yourself. If you wait to speak until you're sure your words will be welcomed, you might as well hand over your voice entirely—because death [or Trump-Musk-Putin] will claim it long before you dare to use it.

We all, or is it just me, yearn for freedom—that profound ability to express ourselves authentically, love with our whole hearts, and create lives without garbage limits. And guess what, you lucky chicken nugget you? Freedom is yours once you decide that pissing people off can be fun!

I’ve been watching someone I deeply respect go through public agonies that reveal they blame others for not feeling like they can speak. They say the fear of judgment has made them, and now makes them again - stay silent - this is such a disempowering stance to take. Honestly, I can hardly stand seeing it. In general, “I don’t feel safe speaking” is not a valid defense for sitting on the sidelines.

It’s no one else’s job to make it safe for us to speak - it’s our job to learn how to navigate blowback and bullshit.

• We make the choice to stay silent.

• We make the choice to let the risk of getting some emotional ouchies determine the course of our lives.

• We give other people’s opinions the power to control our decisions.

• We decide to wait for a green light and engraved permission slip before stating our authentic opinions.

• We did that, not anyone outside of us.

The path to this liberated writing-speaking life requires your courage and willingness to embrace the full spectrum of experiences, the All of Life, along the way.

The real question isn't whether you want freedom—it's whether you're ready to say yes to the amazing journey of ups, downs, and sideways troll slaps that come with it!

Turn Criticism into Celebration.

If someone’s mad, you know you’re doing a good job!

Imagine your voice being heard, your work deeply valued to the point people message you about it, and your ideas welcomed with the same joy we feel seeing puppies! This can be your reality when you decide to share your authentic self with the world. It also might not be. It might be painful af.

The reaction from the peanut gallery isn’t the fucking point - writing - expressing - speaking up is what matters, not what some troll living in mommy’s basement and dressing up like Elon Musk has to say about it.

Yes, some people might not understand your vision right away. That's okay! Repeat after me: I don’t give a fuck. I will speak my truth and express myself by making a joyful, or rageful, noise.

Every influential author, artist, entrepreneur, and thought leader started not with universal approval but with fear. They had to scrape up the courage to share their truth with the willingness to take shit if they had to. Their fan bases didn't appear overnight—they grew from that first brave step forward. Those first words, those first notes, those first sweaty palms and stuttering sounds.

When you consider the sheer amount of steaming hot trash thrown at Taylor Swift on the daily, which she uses as fuel to become a literal financial powerhouse, who are we to complain that we can’t write because Grandma Edna might get a case of the vapors from our use of the F-bomb?

When you embrace the possibility [probability] of criticism as part of your growth, you open the door to genuine celebration of your work. Isn't that possibility worth stepping out of your comfort zone? Remember that death bit at the beginning? There will come a day when you no longer have a voice - frankly that lights a fire in me to get my work out there and to help everyone I can to do the same.

Writing Impacts Hearts More Than We Know

Reason #4, 893 to write authentically is that the most fulfilling love—the kind that expands your heart and transforms your life—blossoms through honest vulnerability. Showing up fully, speaking honestly, being truly seen, and embracing your unique qualities create the foundation for profound connection.

How can you have deep relationships if you’re hiding in silence? How will they know who you really are? What happens when 10 years into a marriage, one person starts blurting out how they really feel about pineapple on pizza?

Speaking openly will create awkward moments, embarrassing slips, and misunderstood messages. They're just stepping stones on the path to deep, wholehearted love though. While love isn't always predictable, it offers the most rewarding experience we can know IF we are in the relationship as our truest selves. My worst nightmare was finding out that my ex had been lying to me for years. I had been living with a stranger and didn’t even know it.

When you welcome both the messy and magnificent aspects of all of you, you create space for authentic connections that can change your life forever!

Take That First Exciting Step Toward Success [can you tell ChatGPT gave me these cheeseball section headers?]

We all admire those who achieve remarkable things—the creators, innovators, and leaders who make their mark and overcome all manner of crazy things to succeed. Their secret? They didn't wait until everything felt perfect. They started where they were, with what they had.

The success you dream about and deserve is waiting for you on the other side of taking action. We want to be sure and then act, but it happens in reverse. Action comes first, and often, that means getting into action while wanting to hurl from anxiety.

Each step forward—even the imperfect ones—brings you closer to the achievements you envision. Those we admire most began before they felt completely ready, and that's exactly what made them successful - they felt the fear and started expressing their voices anyway.

Why not start today impacting the lives of those who NEED to hear/read your words? You know, start now…before you’re dead? Your future self will thank you for having the courage to begin now rather than waiting for perfect conditions that may never [will never] arrive.

Your Freedom to Write Starts with a Decision

The fulfilled, expressive life you desire is ready and waiting for you to decide that you WILL write. It simply asks for the willingness to embrace every part of the journey—the challenges that trip you up but eventually strengthen you and the triumphs that reward you.

Are you ready to celebrate criticism?
Can you imagine welcoming your first hater as proof you’re in motion?
Ready for vulnerability that opens the door to profound life-force energy?
Action that paves the way to creative success?

If your answer is yes, [it had better be!], then you're already on your way to living with true freedom and expression, haters be damned!

XO,
LMW

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Photo by Patrick Fore on Unsplash